You can not select more than 25 topics
Topics must start with a letter or number, can include dashes ('-') and can be up to 35 characters long.
680 lines
26 KiB
680 lines
26 KiB
%
|
|
Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing.
|
|
%
|
|
Let's call it an accidental feature.
|
|
-- Larry Wall
|
|
%
|
|
I did this 'cause Linux gives me a woody. It doesn't generate revenue.
|
|
-- Dave '-ddt->` Taylor, announcing DOOM for Linux
|
|
%
|
|
Feel free to contact me (flames about my english and the useless of this
|
|
driver will be redirected to /dev/null, oh no, it's full...).
|
|
-- Michael Beck, describing the PC-speaker sound device
|
|
%
|
|
lp1 on fire
|
|
-- One of the more obfuscated kernel messages
|
|
%
|
|
A Linux machine! Because a 486 is a terrible thing to waste!
|
|
-- Joe Sloan, jjs@wintermute.ucr.edu
|
|
%
|
|
Microsoft is not the answer.
|
|
Microsoft is the question.
|
|
NO (or Linux) is the answer.
|
|
-- Taken from a .signature from someone from the UK, source unknown
|
|
%
|
|
In most countries selling harmful things like drugs is punishable.
|
|
Then howcome people can sell Microsoft software and go unpunished?
|
|
-- Hasse Skrifvars, hasku@rost.abo.fi,
|
|
%
|
|
Windows without the X is like making love without a partner.
|
|
Sex, Drugs & Linux Rules
|
|
win-nt from the people who invented edlin.
|
|
Apples have meant trouble since eden.
|
|
Linux, the way to get rid of boot viruses
|
|
-- MaDsen Wikholm, mwikholm@at8.abo.fi
|
|
%
|
|
Once upon a time there was a DOS user who saw Unix, and saw that it was
|
|
good. After typing cp on his DOS machine at home, he downloaded GNU's
|
|
unix tools ported to DOS and installed them. He rm'd, cp'd, and mv'd
|
|
happily for many days, and upon finding elvis, he vi'd and was happy. After
|
|
a long day at work (on a Unix box) he came home, started editing a file,
|
|
and couldn't figure out why he couldn't suspend vi (w/ ctrl-z) to do
|
|
a compile.
|
|
-- Erik Troan, ewt@tipper.oit.unc.edu
|
|
%
|
|
We are MicroSoft. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile.
|
|
-- Attributed to B.G., Gill Bates
|
|
%
|
|
Avoid the Gates of Hell. Use Linux
|
|
-- unknown source
|
|
%
|
|
Intel engineering seem to have misheard Intel marketing strategy. The
|
|
phrase was "Divide and conquer" not "Divide and cock up"
|
|
-- Alan Cox, iialan@www.linux.org.uk
|
|
%
|
|
Linux! Guerrilla UNIX Development Venimus, Vidimus, Dolavimus.
|
|
-- Mark A. Horton KA4YBR, mah@ka4ybr.com
|
|
%
|
|
"Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?"
|
|
Microsoft spel chekar vor sail, worgs grate !!
|
|
-- Felix von Leitner, leitner@inf.fu-berlin.de
|
|
%
|
|
Personally, I think my choice in the mostest-superlative-computer wars has to
|
|
be the HP-48 series of calculators. They'll run almost anything. And if they
|
|
can't, while I'll just plug a Linux box into the serial port and load up the
|
|
HP-48 VT-100 emulator.
|
|
-- Jeff Dege, jdege@winternet.com
|
|
%
|
|
There are no threads in a.b.p.erotica, so there's no gain in using a
|
|
threaded news reader.
|
|
-- unknown source
|
|
%
|
|
/*
|
|
* Oops. The kernel tried to access some bad page. We'll have to
|
|
* terminate things with extreme prejudice.
|
|
*/
|
|
die_if_kernel("Oops", regs, error_code);
|
|
-- From linux/arch/i386/mm/fault.c
|
|
%
|
|
Linux: because a PC is a terrible thing to waste
|
|
-- ksh@cis.ufl.edu put this on Tshirts in '93
|
|
%
|
|
Linux: the choice of a GNU generation
|
|
-- ksh@cis.ufl.edu put this on Tshirts in '93
|
|
%
|
|
There are two types of Linux developers - those who can spell, and
|
|
those who can't. There is a constant pitched battle between the two.
|
|
-- From one of the post-1.1.54 kernel update messages posted to c.o.l.a
|
|
%
|
|
When you say "I wrote a program that crashed Windows", people just stare at
|
|
you blankly and say "Hey, I got those with the system, *for free*".
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
We come to bury DOS, not to praise it.
|
|
-- Paul Vojta, vojta@math.berkeley.edu
|
|
%
|
|
Be warned that typing killall name may not have the desired
|
|
effect on non-Linux systems, especially when done by a privileged user.
|
|
-- From the killall manual page
|
|
%
|
|
Note that if I can get you to "su and say" something just by asking,
|
|
you have a very serious security problem on your system and you should
|
|
look into it.
|
|
-- Paul Vixie, vixie-cron 3.0.1 installation notes
|
|
%
|
|
How should I know if it works? That's what beta testers are for. I
|
|
only coded it.
|
|
-- Attributed to Linus Torvalds, somewhere in a posting
|
|
%
|
|
I develop for Linux for a living, I used to develop for DOS.
|
|
Going from DOS to Linux is like trading a glider for an F117.
|
|
-- Lawrence Foard, entropy@world.std.com
|
|
%
|
|
Absolutely nothing should be concluded from these figures except that
|
|
no conclusion can be drawn from them.
|
|
-- Joseph L. Brothers, Linux/PowerPC Project)
|
|
%
|
|
If the future navigation system [for interactive networked services on
|
|
the NII] looks like something from Microsoft, it will never work.
|
|
-- Chairman of Walt Disney Television & Telecommunications
|
|
%
|
|
Problem solving under Linux has never been the circus that it is under
|
|
AIX.
|
|
-- Pete Ehlke in comp.unix.aix
|
|
%
|
|
I don't know why, but first C programs tend to look a lot worse than
|
|
first programs in any other language (maybe except for fortran, but then
|
|
I suspect all fortran programs look like `firsts')
|
|
-- Olaf Kirch
|
|
%
|
|
On a normal ascii line, the only safe condition to detect is a 'BREAK'
|
|
- everything else having been assigned functions by Gnu EMACS.
|
|
-- Tarl Neustaedter
|
|
%
|
|
By golly, I'm beginning to think Linux really *is* the best thing since
|
|
sliced bread.
|
|
-- Vance Petree, Virginia Power
|
|
%
|
|
I'd crawl over an acre of 'Visual This++' and 'Integrated Development
|
|
That' to get to gcc, Emacs, and gdb. Thank you.
|
|
-- Vance Petree, Virginia Power
|
|
%
|
|
Oh, I've seen copies [of Linux Journal] around the terminal room at The Labs.
|
|
-- Dennis Ritchie
|
|
%
|
|
If you want to travel around the world and be invited to speak at a lot
|
|
of different places, just write a Unix operating system.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
...and scantily clad females, of course. Who cares if it's below zero
|
|
outside.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
...you might as well skip the Xmas celebration completely, and instead
|
|
sit in front of your linux computer playing with the all-new-and-improved
|
|
linux kernel version.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
Besides, I think Slackware sounds better than 'Microsoft,' don't you?
|
|
-- Patrick Volkerding
|
|
%
|
|
All language designers are arrogant. Goes with the territory...
|
|
-- Larry Wall
|
|
%
|
|
And the next time you consider complaining that running Lucid Emacs
|
|
19.05 via NFS from a remote Linux machine in Paraguay doesn't seem to
|
|
get the background colors right, you'll know who to thank.
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
Are Linux users lemmings collectively jumping off of the cliff of
|
|
reliable, well-engineered commercial software?
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
Even more amazing was the realization that God has Internet access. I
|
|
wonder if He has a full newsfeed?
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
I once witnessed a long-winded, month-long flamewar over the use of
|
|
mice vs. trackballs... It was very silly.
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
Linux poses a real challenge for those with a taste for late-night
|
|
hacking (and/or conversations with God).
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
What you end up with, after running an operating system concept through
|
|
these many marketing coffee filters, is something not unlike plain hot
|
|
water.
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
...Deep Hack Mode -- that mysterious and frightening state of
|
|
consciousness where Mortal Users fear to tread.
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
...Unix, MS-DOS, and Windows NT (also known as the Good, the Bad, and
|
|
the Ugly).
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
...very few phenomena can pull someone out of Deep Hack Mode, with two
|
|
noted exceptions: being struck by lightning, or worse, your *computer*
|
|
being struck by lightning.
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
..you could spend *all day* customizing the title bar. Believe me. I
|
|
speak from experience.
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
[In 'Doctor' mode], I spent a good ten minutes telling Emacs what I
|
|
thought of it. (The response was, 'Perhaps you could try to be less
|
|
abusive.')
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
I would rather spend 10 hours reading someone else's source code than
|
|
10 minutes listening to Musak waiting for technical support which isn't.
|
|
-- Dr. Greg Wettstein, Roger Maris Cancer Center
|
|
%
|
|
...[Linux's] capacity to talk via any medium except smoke Q_SIGNALS.
|
|
-- Dr. Greg Wettstein, Roger Maris Cancer Center
|
|
%
|
|
Whip me. Beat me. Make me maintain AIX.
|
|
-- Stephan Zielinski
|
|
%
|
|
Your job is being a professor and researcher: That's one hell of a good excuse
|
|
for some of the brain-damages of minix.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds to Andrew Tanenbaum
|
|
%
|
|
I still maintain the point that designing a monolithic kernel in 1991 is a
|
|
fundamental error. Be thankful you are not my student. You would not get a
|
|
high grade for such a design :-)
|
|
-- Andrew Tanenbaum to Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
We use Linux for all our mission-critical applications. Having the source code
|
|
means that we are not held hostage by anyone's support department.
|
|
-- Russell Nelson, President of Crynwr Software
|
|
%
|
|
Linux is obsolete
|
|
-- Andrew Tanenbaum
|
|
%
|
|
Dijkstra probably hates me.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, in kernel/sched.c
|
|
%
|
|
And 1.1.81 is officially BugFree(tm), so if you receive any bug-reports
|
|
on it, you know they are just evil lies.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
We are Pentium of Borg. Division is futile. You will be approximated.
|
|
-- seen in someone's .signature
|
|
%
|
|
Linux: the operating system with a CLUE... Command Line User Environment.
|
|
-- seen in a posting in comp.software.testing
|
|
%
|
|
quit When the quit statement is read, the bc processor
|
|
is terminated, regardless of where the quit state-
|
|
ment is found. For example, "if (0 == 1) quit"
|
|
will cause bc to terminate.
|
|
-- seen in the manpage for "bc". Note the "if" statement's logic
|
|
%
|
|
Sic transit discus mundi
|
|
-- From the System Administrator's Guide, by Lars Wirzenius
|
|
%
|
|
Sigh. I like to think it's just the Linux people who want to be on
|
|
the "leading edge" so bad they walk right off the precipice.
|
|
-- Craig E. Groeschel
|
|
%
|
|
We all know Linux is great... it does infinite loops in 5 seconds.
|
|
- Linus Torvalds about the superiority of Linux on the Amterdam Linux Symposium
|
|
%
|
|
Waving away a cloud of smoke, I look up, and am blinded by a bright, white
|
|
light. It's God. No, not Richard Stallman, or Linus Torvalds, but God. In
|
|
a booming voice, He says: "THIS IS A SIGN. USE LINUX, THE FREE UNIX SYSTEM
|
|
FOR THE 386.
|
|
-- Matt Welsh
|
|
%
|
|
The chat program is in public domain. This is not the GNU public license.
|
|
If it breaks then you get to keep both pieces.
|
|
-- Copyright notice for the chat program
|
|
%
|
|
'Mounten' wird fr drei Dinge benutzt: 'Aufsitzen' auf Pferde, 'einklinken'
|
|
von Festplatten in Dateisysteme, und, nun, 'besteigen' beim Sex.
|
|
-- Christa Keil
|
|
%
|
|
Manchmal stehe nachts auf und installier's mir einfach...
|
|
-- H0arry @ IRC
|
|
%
|
|
'Mounting' is used for three things: climbing on a horse, linking in a
|
|
hard disk unit in data systems, and, well, mounting during sex.
|
|
-- Christa Keil
|
|
%
|
|
We are using Linux daily to UP our productivity - so UP yours!
|
|
-- Adapted from Pat Paulsen by Joe Sloan
|
|
%
|
|
But what can you do with it?
|
|
-- ubiquitous cry from Linux-user partner
|
|
%
|
|
/*
|
|
* [...] Note that 120 sec is defined in the protocol as the maximum
|
|
* possible RTT. I guess we'll have to use something other than TCP
|
|
* to talk to the University of Mars.
|
|
* PAWS allows us longer timeouts and large windows, so once implemented
|
|
* ftp to mars will work nicely.
|
|
*/
|
|
-- from /usr/src/linux/net/inet/tcp.c, concerning RTT [round trip time]
|
|
%
|
|
DOS: n., A small annoying boot virus that causes random spontaneous system
|
|
crashes, usually just before saving a massive project. Easily cured by
|
|
UNIX. See also MS-DOS, IBM-DOS, DR-DOS.
|
|
-- David Vicker's .plan
|
|
%
|
|
MSDOS didn't get as bad as it is overnight -- it took over ten years
|
|
of careful development.
|
|
-- dmeggins@aix1.uottawa.ca
|
|
%
|
|
LILO, you've got me on my knees!
|
|
-- David Black, dblack@pilot.njin.net, with apologies to Derek and the
|
|
Dominos, and Werner Almsberger
|
|
%
|
|
I've run DOOM more in the last few days than I have the last few
|
|
months. I just love debugging ;-)
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
Microsoft Corp., concerned by the growing popularity of the free 32-bit
|
|
operating system for Intel systems, Linux, has employed a number of top
|
|
programmers from the underground world of virus development. Bill Gates stated
|
|
yesterday: "World domination, fast -- it's either us or Linus". Mr. Torvalds
|
|
was unavailable for comment ...
|
|
-- Robert Manners, rjm@swift.eng.ox.ac.uk, in comp.os.linux.setup
|
|
%
|
|
The only "intuitive" interface is the nipple. After that, it's all learned.
|
|
-- Bruce Ediger, bediger@teal.csn.org, on X interfaces
|
|
%
|
|
After watching my newly-retired dad spend two weeks learning how to make a new
|
|
folder, it became obvious that "intuitive" mostly means "what the writer or
|
|
speaker of intuitive likes".
|
|
-- Bruce Ediger, bediger@teal.csn.org, on X the intuitiveness of a Mac interface
|
|
%
|
|
Now I know someone out there is going to claim, "Well then, UNIX is intuitive,
|
|
because you only need to learn 5000 commands, and then everything else follows
|
|
from that! Har har har!"
|
|
-- Andy Bates on "intuitive interfaces", slightly defending Macs
|
|
%
|
|
> No manual is ever necessary.
|
|
May I politely interject here: BULLSHIT. That's the biggest Apple lie of all!
|
|
-- Discussion in comp.os.linux.misc on the intuitiveness of interfaces
|
|
%
|
|
How do I type "for i in *.dvi do xdvi $i done" in a GUI?
|
|
-- Discussion in comp.os.linux.misc on the intuitiveness of interfaces
|
|
%
|
|
>Ever heard of .cshrc?
|
|
That's a city in Bosnia. Right?
|
|
-- Discussion in comp.os.linux.misc on the intuitiveness of commands
|
|
%
|
|
Who wants to remember that escape-x-alt-control-left shift-b puts you into
|
|
super-edit-debug-compile mode?
|
|
-- Discussion on the intuitiveness of commands, especially Emacs
|
|
%
|
|
Anyone who thinks UNIX is intuitive should be forced to write 5000 lines of
|
|
code using nothing but vi or emacs. AAAAACK!
|
|
-- Discussion on the intuitiveness of commands, especially Emacs
|
|
%
|
|
Now, it we had this sort of thing:
|
|
yield -a for yield to all traffic
|
|
yield -t for yield to trucks
|
|
yield -f for yield to people walking (yield foot)
|
|
yield -d t* for yield on days starting with t
|
|
|
|
...you'd have a lot of dead people at intersections, and traffic jams you
|
|
wouldn't believe...
|
|
-- Discussion on the intuitiveness of commands
|
|
%
|
|
Actually, typing random strings in the Finder does the equivalent of
|
|
filename completion.
|
|
-- Discussion on file completion vs. the Mac Finder
|
|
%
|
|
Not me, guy. I read the Bash man page each day like a Jehovah's Witness reads
|
|
the Bible. No wait, the Bash man page IS the bible. Excuse me...
|
|
-- More on confusing aliases, taken from comp.os.linux.misc
|
|
%
|
|
On the Internet, no one knows you're using Windows NT
|
|
-- Submitted by Ramiro Estrugo, restrugo@fateware.com
|
|
%
|
|
> I'm an idiot.. At least this [bug] took about 5 minutes to find..
|
|
Disquieting ...
|
|
-- Gonzalo Tornaria in response to Linus Torvalds's
|
|
%
|
|
> I'm an idiot.. At least this [bug] took about 5 minutes to find..
|
|
We need to find some new terms to describe the rest of us mere mortals
|
|
then.
|
|
-- Craig Schlenter in response to Linus Torvalds's
|
|
%
|
|
> I'm an idiot.. At least this [bug] took about 5 minutes to find..
|
|
Surely, Linus is talking about the kind of idiocy that others aspire to :-).
|
|
-- Bruce Perens in response to Linus Torvalds's
|
|
%
|
|
Never make any mistaeks.
|
|
-- Anonymous, in a mail discussion about to a kernel bug report
|
|
%
|
|
+#if defined(__alpha__) && defined(CONFIG_PCI)
|
|
+ /*
|
|
+ * The meaning of life, the universe, and everything. Plus
|
|
+ * this makes the year come out right.
|
|
+ */
|
|
+ year -= 42;
|
|
+#endif
|
|
-- From the patch for 1.3.2: (kernel/time.c), submitted by Marcus Meissner
|
|
%
|
|
As usual, this being a 1.3.x release, I haven't even compiled this
|
|
kernel yet. So if it works, you should be doubly impressed.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, announcing kernel 1.3.3
|
|
%
|
|
People disagree with me. I just ignore them.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, regarding the use of C++ for the Linux kernel
|
|
%
|
|
It's now the GNU Emacs of all terminal emulators.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, regarding the fact that Linux started off as a terminal emulator
|
|
%
|
|
Audience: What will become of Linux when the Hurd is ready?
|
|
Eric Youngdale: Err... is Richard Stallman here?
|
|
-- From the Linux conference in spring '95, Berlin
|
|
%
|
|
Linux: The OS people choose without $200,000,000 of persuasion.
|
|
-- Mike Coleman
|
|
%
|
|
The memory management on the PowerPC can be used to frighten small tqchildren.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
... faster BogoMIPS calculations (yes, it now boots 2 seconds faster than
|
|
it used to: we're considering changing the name from "Linux" to "InstaBOOT"
|
|
-- Linus, in the announcement for 1.3.26
|
|
%
|
|
... of course, this probably only happens for tcsh which uses wait4(),
|
|
which is why I never saw it. Serves people who use that abomination
|
|
right 8^)
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, about a patch that fixes getrusage for 1.3.26
|
|
%
|
|
It's a bird..
|
|
It's a plane..
|
|
No, it's KernelMan, faster than a speeding bullet, to your rescue.
|
|
Doing new kernel versions in under 5 seconds flat..
|
|
-- Linus, in the announcement for 1.3.27
|
|
%
|
|
Eh, that's it, I guess. No 300 million dollar unveiling event for this
|
|
kernel, I'm afraid, but you're still supposed to think of this as the
|
|
"happening of the century" (at least until the next kernel comes along).
|
|
-- Linus, in the announcement for 1.3.27
|
|
%
|
|
Oh, and this is another kernel in that great and venerable "BugFree(tm)"
|
|
series of kernels. So be not afraid of bugs, but go out in the streets
|
|
and deliver this message of joy to the masses.
|
|
-- Linus, in the announcement for 1.3.27
|
|
%
|
|
When you say 'I wrote a program that crashed Windows', people just stare at
|
|
you blankly and say 'Hey, I got those with the system, *for free*'.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
Never trust an operating system you don't have sources for. ;-)
|
|
-- Unknown source
|
|
%
|
|
> Linux is not user-friendly.
|
|
It _is_ user-friendly. It is not ignorant-friendly and idiot-friendly.
|
|
-- Seen somewhere on the net
|
|
%
|
|
Keep me informed on the behaviour of this kernel.. As the "BugFree(tm)"
|
|
series didn't turn out too well, I'm starting a new series called the
|
|
"ItWorksForMe(tm)" series, of which this new kernel is yet another
|
|
shining example.
|
|
-- Linus, in the announcement for 1.3.29
|
|
%
|
|
Seriously, the way I did this was by using a special /sbin/loader binary
|
|
with debugging hooks that I made ("dd" is your friend: binary editors
|
|
are for wimps).
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, in an article on a dnserver
|
|
%
|
|
(I tried to get some documentation out of Digital on this, but as far as
|
|
I can tell even _they_ don't have it ;-)
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, in an article on a dnserver
|
|
%
|
|
Q: Why shouldn't I simply delete the stuff I never use, it's just taking up
|
|
space?
|
|
A: This question is in the category of Famous Last Words..
|
|
-- From the Frequently Unasked Questions
|
|
%
|
|
Q: What's the big deal about rm, I have been deleting stuff for years? And
|
|
never lost anything.. oops!
|
|
A: ...
|
|
-- From the Frequently Unasked Questions
|
|
%
|
|
Linux is addictive, I'm hooked!
|
|
-- MaDsen Wikholm's .sig
|
|
%
|
|
panic("Foooooooood fight!");
|
|
-- In the kernel source aha1542.c, after detecting a bad segment list
|
|
%
|
|
Convention organizer to Linus Torvalds: "You might like to come with us
|
|
to some licensed[1] place, and have some pizza."
|
|
|
|
Linus: "Oh, I did not know that you needed a license to eat pizza".
|
|
|
|
[1] Licenced - refers in Australia to a restaurant which has government
|
|
licence to sell liquor.
|
|
-- Linus at a talk at the Melbourne University
|
|
%
|
|
Footnotes are for things you believe don't really belong in LDP manuals,
|
|
but want to include anyway.
|
|
-- Joel N. Weber II discussing the 'make' chapter of LPG
|
|
%
|
|
Eh, that's it, I guess. No 300 million dollar unveiling event for this
|
|
kernel, I'm afraid, but you're still supposed to think of this as the
|
|
"happening of the century" (at least until the next kernel comes along).
|
|
Oh, and this is another kernel in that great and venerable "BugFree(tm)"
|
|
series of kernels. So be not afraid of bugs, but go out in the streets
|
|
and deliver this message of joy to the masses.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, on releasing 1.3.27
|
|
%
|
|
Ok, I'm just uploading the new version of the kernel, v1.3.33, also
|
|
known as "the buggiest kernel ever".
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
Go not unto the Usenet for advice, for you will be told both yea and nay (and
|
|
quite a few things that just have nothing at all to do with the question).
|
|
-- seen in a .sig somewhere
|
|
%
|
|
Those who don't understand Linux are doomed to reinvent it, poorly.
|
|
-- unidentified source
|
|
%
|
|
Look, I'm about to buy me a double barreled sawed off shotgun and show
|
|
Linus what I think about backspace and delete not working.
|
|
-- some anonymous .signature
|
|
%
|
|
We apologize for the inconvenience, but we'd still like yout to test out
|
|
this kernel.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, announcing another kernel patch
|
|
%
|
|
The new Linux anthem will be "He's an idiot, but he's ok", as performed by
|
|
Monthy Python. You'd better start practicing.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, announcing another kernel patch
|
|
%
|
|
How do you power off this machine?
|
|
-- Linus, when upgrading linux.cs.helsinki.fi, and after using the machine for several months
|
|
%
|
|
Excusing bad programming is a shooting offence, no matter _what_ the
|
|
circumstances.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, to the linux-kernel list
|
|
%
|
|
Linus? Whose that?
|
|
-- clueless newbie on #Linux
|
|
%
|
|
Whoa...I did a 'zcat /vmlinuz > /dev/audio' and I think I heard God...
|
|
-- mikecd on #Linux
|
|
%
|
|
Some people have told me they don't think a fat penguin really embodies the
|
|
grace of Linux, which just tells me they have never seen a angry penguin
|
|
charging at them in excess of 100mph. They'd be a lot more careful about what
|
|
they say if they had.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, announcing Linux v2.0
|
|
%
|
|
MS-DOS, you can't live with it, you can live without it.
|
|
-- from Lars Wirzenius' .sig
|
|
%
|
|
.. I used to get in more fights with SCO than I did my girlfriend, but
|
|
now, thanks to Linux, she has more than happily accepted her place back at
|
|
number one antagonist in my life..
|
|
-- Jason Stiefel, krypto@s30.nmex.com
|
|
%
|
|
I mean, well, if it were not for Linux I might be roaming the streets looking
|
|
for drugs or prostitutes or something. Hannu and Linus have my highest
|
|
admiration (apple polishing mode off).
|
|
-- Phil Lewis, plewis@nyx.nyx.net
|
|
%
|
|
> What does ELF stand for (in respect to Linux?)
|
|
ELF is the first rock group that Ronnie James Dio performed with back in
|
|
the early 1970's. In constrast, a.out is a misspelling of the French word
|
|
for the month of August. What the two have in common is beyond me, but
|
|
Linux users seem to use the two words together.
|
|
-- seen on c.o.l.misc
|
|
%
|
|
"Linux was made by foreign terrorists to take money from true US companies
|
|
like Microsoft." - Some AOL'er.
|
|
"To this end we dedicate ourselves..." -Don
|
|
-- From the sig of "Don", don@cs.byu.edu
|
|
%
|
|
Shoot me again.
|
|
Just proving that the quickest way to solve the problem is to post a
|
|
whine to the newsgroups: within moments the solution presents itself to
|
|
me, and meanwhile my ass is hanging out on the Net... *sigh*...
|
|
-- Dave Phillips, dlphilp@bright.net, about problem solving via news
|
|
%
|
|
Besides, its really not worthwhile to use more than two times your physical
|
|
ram in swap (except in a select few situations). The performance of the system
|
|
becomes so abysmal you'd rather heat pins under your toenails while reciting
|
|
Windows95 source code and staring at porn flicks of Bob Dole than actually try
|
|
to type something.
|
|
-- seen on c.o.l.development.system, about the size of the swap space
|
|
%
|
|
Only wimps use tape backup: _real_ men just upload their important stuff
|
|
on ftp, and let the rest of the world mirror it ;)
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds, about his failing hard drive on linux.cs.helsinki.fi
|
|
%
|
|
One of the things that hamper Linux's climb to world domination is the
|
|
shortage of bad Computer Role Playing Games, or CRaPGs. No operating system
|
|
can be considered respectable without one.
|
|
-- Brian O'Donnell, odonnllb@tcd.ie
|
|
%
|
|
The game, anoraks.2.0.0.tgz, will be available from sunsite until somebody
|
|
responsible notices it and deletes it, and shortly from
|
|
ftp.mee.tcd.ie/pub/Brian, though they don't know that yet.
|
|
-- Brian O'Donnell, odonnllb@tcd.ie
|
|
%
|
|
'Ooohh.. "FreeBSD is faster over loopback, when compared to Linux
|
|
over the wire". Film at 11.'
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
%
|
|
Q: Would you like to see the WINE list?
|
|
A: What's on it, anything expensive?
|
|
Q: No, just Solitaire and MineSweeper for now, but the WINE is free.
|
|
-- Kevin M. Bealer, about the WINdows Emulator
|
|
%
|
|
So in the future, one 'client' at a time or you'll be spending CPU time with
|
|
lots of little 'child processes'.
|
|
-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the private life of a Linux nerd
|
|
%
|
|
By the way, I can hardly feel sorry for you... All last night I had to listen
|
|
to her tears, so great they were redirected to a stream. What? Of _course_
|
|
you didn't know. You and your little group no longer have any permissions
|
|
around here. She changed her .lock files, too.
|
|
-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the private life of a Linux nerd
|
|
%
|
|
We should start referring to processes which run in the background by their
|
|
correct technical name... paenguins.
|
|
-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the penguin Linux logo
|
|
%
|
|
We can use symlinks of course... syslogd would be a symlink to syslogp and
|
|
ftpd and ircd would be linked to ftpp and ircp... and of course the
|
|
point-to-point protocal paenguin.
|
|
-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the penguin Linux logo
|
|
%
|
|
This is a logical analogy too... anyone who's been around, knows the world is
|
|
run by paenguins. Always a paenguin behind the curtain, really getting things
|
|
done. And paenguins in politics--who can deny it?
|
|
-- Kevin M. Bealer, commenting on the penguin Linux logo
|
|
%
|
|
Linux: Where Don't We Want To Go Today?
|
|
-- Submitted by Pancrazio De Mauro, paraphrasing some well-known sales talk
|
|
%
|
|
The most important design issue... is the fact that Linux is supposed to
|
|
be fun...
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds at the First Dutch International Symposium on Linux
|
|
%
|
|
In short, at least give the penguin a fair viewing. If you still don't
|
|
like it, that's ok: that's why I'm boss. I simply know better than you do.
|
|
-- Linus "what, me arrogant?" Torvalds, on c.o.l.advocacy
|
|
%
|
|
<SomeLamer> what's the difference between chattr and chmod?
|
|
<SomeGuru> SomeLamer: man chattr > 1; man chmod > 2; diff -u 1 2 | less
|
|
-- Seen on #linux on irc
|
|
%
|
|
The linuX Files -- The Source is Out There.
|
|
-- Sent in by Craig S. Bell, goat@aracnet.com
|
|
%
|
|
"... being a Linux user is sort of like living in a house inhabited
|
|
by a large family of carpenters and architects. Every morning when
|
|
you wake up, the house is a little different. Maybe there is a new
|
|
turret, or some walls have moved. Or perhaps someone has temporarily
|
|
removed the floor under your bed." - Unix for Dummies, 2nd Edition
|
|
-- found in the .sig of Rob Riggs, rriggs@tesser.com
|
|
%
|
|
C is quirky, flawed, and an enormous success
|
|
-- Dennis M. Ritchie
|
|
%
|
|
If Bill Gates is the Devil then Linus Torvalds must be the Messiah.
|
|
-- Unknown source
|
|
%
|
|
Vini, vidi, Linux!
|
|
-- Unknown source
|
|
%
|
|
The good thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from.
|
|
-- Andrew S. Tanenbaum
|
|
%
|
|
I'm telling you that the kernel is stable not because it's a kernel,
|
|
but because I refuse to listen to arguments like this.
|
|
-- Linus Torvalds
|
|
% |